Bork Slowly Borking

 Think I might post here less frequently now. Seem to have got into a fairly predictable pattern healthwise. Tingles are oh so slowly fading. I am learning not to push it - in fact I'm taking a week off next week. Almost unprecedented. Weakness comes and goes. Repeated headaches have been a feature of late that can morph into tingles. Uh huh. Been talking to a couple of people about Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. Their experiences with it ring horribly true for me. It gives me some reassurance however to know a bit more. I still find it hard to accept the wishy washy diagnosis. But. Eh. Ares turned out to be none the worse for wear for eating the plushie. Not sure if he did eat it in the end, although it was in the garden and slimy. So. Who knows. General condition. Poor lad is struggling a tad. He's still ok and can be quite perky and very interested in dinner. But his back legs are going more regularly. He ends up halfway doing the splits. He half fell down the stairs a day or so ...

 Struggled to get on my feet this week, although yesterday was a pretty good day, and I didn't push it. Chronic Fatigue clinic questionnaires have come through the post. Something like 12 pages in all spread over 2 documents. Some of the questions they ask are on point. Filled one in yesterday, will do the other today. Was having a good day until late at night, Hazel came upstairs, informed me Ares had eaten something he shouldn't have. A plushie. He's never done it before. And the plush in question has been a favourite for tug for many years. For some reason, he decided to eat it. There was no way he was sicking it up. And likewise, operating on him at his age, in his health.... not good. So. I guess we wait. And see if it passes. If it doesn't... Or maybe Hazel made a mistake and he didn't eat it. But I doubt she's mistaken. I'm just hoping that if he had chewed it or whatever small enough to eat, it should go through. I can't quite believe he's ea...

 Not a great day yesterday. Tired. Started going downhill about 1pm. By 2.30pm I was curled up on the sofa and exhausted. I went to bed. Slept until 6pm. Got up like a zombie risen from the grave. Bloodshot eyes, dark circles under my eyes. Felt even more tired. Stayed up until 9pm ish, went back to bed. Did not feel good. Or right. And bone tired. It made me worried. I said to Hazel I didn't want to go to bed but I had no choice. She said I had been overdoing it again and had paid for it. I washed the car the day before yesterday in a fit of positivity. Not gonna lie by the end of it my legs were proper shaking. But I recovered, and thought that was that. Perhaps not. Yesterday was awful. So bad I thought I was properly regressing into my "can't get out of bed" stage. The most worrying thing is when you sleep for four hours and wake up worse than when you went in. It gives you a certain sense of helplessness. As I drifted off to sleep last night I pondered that in so...

 Good to see that finally the opening up of stuff in the face of the Indian variant of Covid is being questioned. A little bit too late imho. If I can spot the problem a week ago on my half assed keeping on top of current events, surely someone doing a proper job should have been on top of this... when they initially put India on the red list, weeks before and even then, hey, wont everyone rush back from India to beat our red list day and just make the problem worse ? nah. . . that would never happen. . . oh. I think the whole give em a week or two of warning so they can all rush back bullshit is laughably idiotic. All it does is guarantee you a spike of infections. The reverse of what you're trying to achieve. Red list travel bans should be without warning and instant. Anyone that needs to come back can - but they have to sit their ass in government controlled quarantine for 14 days. Is there a problem with that ? Inconvenience. Deal with it. I suspect it's not just a case of ...

 I am beginning to get the hang of my new normal. Which is to say prone to suddenly flagging hardcore and needing a nap. Or sleep. But that's ok. Just go for a sleep. I am also beginning to get the hang of my new normal. Which is to say a certain amount of gloom is settling over what my life is at the moment and an awareness that in some key ways I am still not a functioning adult, or at least, I am not functioning as I used to and have some serious limitations. Symptoms seem to have also settled into an ebb and flow pattern. Over the course of some days, get better, then over some days get worse. Repeat. I *think* each high tide is higher though. I caught myself sensing for my tingles the other day... and couldn't find any. They came along later in the day. Of course. That being said, my tingles and whatnot were so bad yesterday they stopped me sleeping. So. Who knows. Still not sure what to make of it. Still alarmed that I can feel drained and ill after helping unpack the sho...

 Been taking it easy this week. Not workwise. But everything else wise. Lots of sleep. Early to bed. And I've felt better for it. Thursday rolled around, my last "official" working day of the week and I didn't feel as drained as usual. Which probably lead me to overdo it. Hazel asked me was I still working. I checked the time. 5.30pm. How long have you been working today she says. Mmm. I was up at 7.30am ? I don't know. I've watched you she says. When you get absorbed in a problem you don't drink, you don't eat, you don't get up. You just forget your body and churn through a problem. For hours. Uh huh. I took stock of my surroundings. I was sat there, one sock on, one sock half off, one trouser leg half up, slumped in the sofa, laptop perched on me, concentrating, oblivious. She says its part of being hyperfocused. I'm beginning to see that I get absorbed and a day can whizz round without me taking a drink. I'm also starting to suspect that...

 Stop me if you've heard this one before. Country declares things are getting better, opens everything up, encourages mingling, just as a new worrying covid variant pops up. Today it was declared that half of all covid cases in London are now the Indian variant which has been noted to be much more transmissible and the WHO announced today it was a variant of "global concern". It was also noted that from 17th May mingling fun would return in the UK. Is it just me ? Is this rocket science ? I think we're due an Autumn - if not Summer - of raging covid. And this time it will spread through a vaccinated population and mutate into something that gets around it. It's how evolution works. Survival of the fittest. It's the same principle as to why fewer and fewer antibiotics work. And if you give the nasties a chance to survive and adapt, the antibiotic in question quickly becomes useless. Do we learn ? No. We do not. In my estimation the coming months are likely to b...