The Empire Strikes Back

 A return of symptoms.

What. The. Hell.

Tired yesterday. Needed to sleep. Couldn't sleep.

For the first time in months I took the dogs for a walk - not just a passive bystander - but took a dog and went for a walk. Which is quite physical given the dog in question pulls and yanks and is a handful.

I was ok til around half way around. Probably an hour walk. Then I started to flag. Then I started to struggle. On the final stretch home a weird thing started happening. Lots of tiny needles prickling me all over my torso. Not pins and needles. But like a single needle. Stab here. Stab there. Lots of them. In quick succession all over. Not too dissimilar I guess to when your hands are very cold and you suddenly warm them up and you get that stabbing.

The intensity increased until it was.. itchy.. sort of. I started scratching.

Left side of my face started really tingling in sympathy.

Breathing went up a notch.

Got home. Could feel my mind disappearing. The reappearance of the erm, erm, erm, instead of words. Conversation seemed like hard work. My back now tingled up and down. Tired. So tired. Vaguely ill. Random pains popping up all over my torso. Pains in chest that would blip in, blip out. Gone before you could almost acknowledge them but very real. A continual... issue left side just at the bottom of the rib cage. This is the one thats almost always there for the last couple of months. It varies in whats happening. But at this point is often a trouble maker.

I curled up on the sofa and felt the familiar downward "deep ocean" tug, of the limbs not wanting to move, of slowing sinking into the depths. Slowly I recovered. Eating something helped.

I. Don't know. My eyes this morning are in their perpetual black eye state. The pattern changes a bit. But always a haggard look.

What the hell. Something is clearly very up. But what ? Are we just to put this down to a mystery vague blob of "post viral malaise". Meh. The docs, in so far as they understand the typical things wrong with people, assure me that I don't seem to be in imminent danger of a heart attack or the like. But. Apart from ruling a whole bunch of stuff out we don't seem closer to a great explanation other than probably viral. Nerve damage seems highly likely. Viral ? MS ? Something else ?

As I'm writing this this morning, somewhere around my heart an ache develops, then leaves. 10 seconds.

? ? ? ?

Just to be very clear. I've never experienced anything like this random shit show in my life.

Pffft. One day at a time.

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