Worse again

 Oh no. Yesterday was bad. Tingles almost seem fixed in place now. A vague headache roiling around. Had the overwhelming urge to continue to head back to bed, for peace, for oblivion. Anxiety spiked up and down at random. Hot flushes. Pains. A palpable sense of doom carries with me.

I feel awful.

And I hate to say it. Thoughts of just ending it all have come back to the fore. I can't do it all again. Not again.

I don't know what to do.

By the evening I had regained a little composure. Enough to play Valheim and chat. But it was fragile, oh so fragile.

And this morning the anxiety demons are back at it. Tingles are there. With a new pain in my left ear that comes and goes. And the weakness in my legs has returned.

Grim. I fear the worst.

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