Jun 6

 Feel rough today.

Can't say exactly how or why. I am exhausted. My mind keeps blurring away from me when I try to do something or concentrate. And despite taking a nap after lunch, I can't shift the tiredness.

This morning, waking up, my anxiety spiked. Oh no. Work tomorrow. Spiiiikkkee.

Mmmm k.

What the hell.

Perhaps it's the rough end of last week working it's way through my system like a dose of poison slowly coming to the surface.

Maybe it's just.. one of those things. Wax and wane.

I've tried doing all sorts of things today to reset it. Chill. Drink. Eat something. Snooze. Do something I am interested in.

Nothing has helped.

Sluggish and bleh. And a delicate feeling stomach. Enough to kill all appetite. And thought of food. No. Thank you.

Hmm. I don't know.

Read a pessmistic article today in the Financial Times. It was headed, is the US headed for civil war. Its conclusion was that it is. And cited a number of intellectuals, democracy watch types, and even the president himself. It makes for grim, if not unexpected, reading.

It also takes the fairly clear implication that if the US falls, the result for the world in general will be a fairly chilling effect to democracy all round.

It also tends to think that the outcome of that civil war is not what you think it will be. Regular well equipped army versus an insurgency. The insurgencies inevitably tend to win. I think the US will fragment. Into a democractic set of loosely allied cities and city states. Think renaissance Venice for say New York. There will also be a vast swathe of old school racist rural areas. And various corporate protectorates. 

With the US divided into a bunch of Also Ran mini countries, the power that something like Apple, or Tesla wields will suddenly become the biggest gorilla in the room. They will do business and skip between anywhere in the globe that takes their fancy. And wield insurmountable financial clout back to states that cannot compete. And thus effectively buy them.

The old ideas of "who owns what" and where country borders start and end will come into serious question, and the ideals of what you take as freedom I think will alter drastically.

New period of human history.

Not good.

Athena is doing alright. She wanted a wrestle today. Despite the grisly wound on her side. Which, is still bloody. Hmmm. But it doesn't seem of affecting her mood. I think the wound is actually a good deal worse that outward appearance - I suspect a chunk of flesh has kinda been.. torn away, and is floating on top, but, eh. We shall see. I will leave her be this week assuming she is still a happy pupper, and try giving the whole thing a good clean towards the end of the week to see where we are.

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