Pre-op Check

 So today I had my pre-op check.

I had my doubts I would be cleared.

Which turned out to be founded. As they collated tests and asked me questions I could see the face. Turn frowny. Then turn very frowny. Then pause. And think. They did a double take over my EKG again. You can tell. Because they say just going to check. They check it. Then they say. Hmm. I want someone else to look at this.

Ah ha ha. Ok.

After the tests and the questions - the result.

I don't think we can clear you, the chief surgical nurse said. There is a concern here that you wont wake up again. I shrugged and gave a wan smile.

You joke she said ( I don't ), but it's important. If it's ok with you, we're going to cancel it. And get you further checked out.

Sure I said.

I imagined more interminable delays. And I figured, if they cancelled now, I doubt I would ever get it done. Because this was as good as I get. I pondered saying I just wanted it done. But I didn't bother. I definitely wasn't going to turn around and say, hey just do it, if I don't wake up, I'm honestly good with that. Because that would cause more frowns.

I was pleasantly non vocal through most of it. Nods. Or shakes of the head. There didn't seem to be much of a need otherwise. There were a few surprising questions. That were off piste. Like the anti depression meds. Did they work, the nurse wanted to know ?

I raised an eyebrow. This was the nurse being curious, not a checkup question.

It's complicated I said. Depends on the drug. Some work. Some don't. They also have different effects. The current ones tend to cut the bottom off of the deepest misery, so you can't get so far down. But. Otherwise. I gave another wan smile and shrugged.

She nodded.

She got increasingly chatty as time went on. Perhaps to fill in my non vocal responses. I wasn't rude. Or weird. Just extremely zen. Let her do her job. Shut up. Listen. Chill. I didn't feel the need to open my mouth.

They kept me back. Everyone else had gone. I was still there.

The nurses chatted with me. Very chatty. They had figured out I wasn't an asshole. And was very zen. Have you seen a tall lady in blue one asked ? No I said. Ahhh. It's the anaesthetist. I want to talk to her. If you see her. Stop her. And tell her a nurse wants to talk to her. Ok.

Weirdly enough. Or perhaps not. I ended up seeing someone I knew on staff. But I only realised after she was halfway down the corridor. I asked the nurses she was talking to. Was that X ? Yes. Ohh. I know her. They then chatted to me too. She's very nice they said. Have you seen her art ? No.

Norwich can be a bit like that for me. Small world. It is a side effect of having been very social for more than a decade and overseen probably a thousand or so people come and go through boardgames at the pub. As it turns out. You get to know a lot of people. And more people get to know you.

I suspect my chances of ever being an anonymous crime lord in Norwich are forever busted. Someone would know me.

So. Surgery cancelled. But they made me wait. And discussed it. And eventually decided to let me pass. Surgery was still on. The chief nurse was not thrilled. I on the other hand, was happier with the result. Good.

There's a possibility it still might get cancelled apparently. They are still mulling over my state. They are super not keen on giving me a general anaesthetic. They explained they might give me a spinal instead so as to keep me at least partially awake.

I did not lie in my answers. But neither did I fill in details either. I gave them answers to what they asked.

If I was a nurse. And I had all the info. I wouldn't clear me either.

Roll on Monday.

If Monday is anything like it was today it is going to be hellish. Packed with people. Interminable waits. The waiting room was full to overflowing and then some. Sigh. I wish the NHS did better.

Funny thing. Everyone I met in there was lovely. Zero complaints. Lovely people.

The system however. Shit. Don't hate the people. Hate the system they work under.

Incidentally. The hospital has recommended that once I have my surgery done. I should go to my GP. And get myself checked out.

Uh huh.

Funny that.